Back to reality. The Noke sucks compared to saranac and cola. Back to parents. Back to work. Back to friends I haven't seen in a month. Now that I'm back with them, i realize I was silly to miss them. Now that they're back and everything is like it was, I kind of wish they'd leave again. I had a great month without them. I learned a lot. About myself. Now that they're back I feel like I am back to where I started. I'd taught myself not to worry about what people thought about me, I'd taught myself not to compare relationships. Now that everyone's back, it's harder to remember all that than I thought. I feel like I'm unwinding everything I learned.
Tomorrow is city county. The big championship summer swim meet. Im excited for the meet, but sad for swim team to end. It's been my whole life pretty much this summer. I'm sad to not see everyone every morning anymore. I'm sad to not have those little kids loving on me. But mostly I'm sad that everything is ending. High school. Summer swim. One of my best friends moved to Europe on Monday. Love you stef. That was the first of many goodbyes. That was hard enough. I don't want to bear anymore. Now that swimming is ending for the summer I can't help but feel like I'm saying goodbye to my family. I know they'll still be around but I won't seem them as often.
I hate goodbyes.
Here's to the many more I have waiting for me in the next month.
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